Tria? Celestria Black? You around love?

[peeks around the bundle of flowers she's holding]

Where the bloody hell am I? One minute I'm gathering flowers for my room and next minute I'm on my arse, clothes akimbo, on some very odd chair.

I have a creeping suspicion I'm not in the castle anymore.

Ah-ha.

[Laughs]

Potter accidentally left her knickers in Hogsmeade.

[Sighs]

[Red rimmed eyes betray the smile that is plastered to her face but doesn't quite reach her eyes: Pasha's been cying]

Hi eweryone.

I should like to have a beau now.

[is dressed in party attire, and yes, she stumbles a little once she gets in the room, giggling. alas! chelsea is blitzed again.]


Oh my God, this is not my bedroom. Why. [pooooooout]

It's official. Hell HAS frozen over. I'm getting married. Twice, of all things, once here.

So far, we know James is going to be the official Panic-Attack-Calmer-Downer, but there are other jobs too --

Notably, who is going to take Papa's place if he doesn't show up here, and walk me down the aisle.

I'm thinking we need a Weasley/Potter/Lupin family meeting or SOMETHING.

There're two white pigeons on the floor. One of them turns her head from side to side conspiringly. Then, with a high, tiny voice she says:

"Come on, quick! We must run away before he finds us!" She turns around, but finds someone behind her. She coos innocently and pecks at the floor, trying to make them think that no, that bird didn't just speak English.

And then the other pigeon blows her cover. "Shit, Ba'al. I think they hear you..." The other bird says with a deeper, yet still high, voice.

I wonder just how many people here have children in other times or dimensions...

[Have a Scor with a bad case of the sniffles, trying not to cough. Don't stand too close!]


..Ah, the joys of having a flat mate who gets germs all over the couch.

I adore Rome. I've barely been out of the villa, and I adore it.

I'm so glad Mum and Dad and Grandma Molly let me come for a week.

But I'm going to the Trevi Fountain soon, and can't decide what wish to make. Suggestions?

...I should learn Italian...

Is Katie Bell here?

Er, I'm.. not lost. Really. I just don't remember that staircase in Hogwarts ever leading here before.

[Pause]

Where is 'here', anyway?

If I never see another sugar cookie again, it will be too soon. I think... I may have the stomach ache from hell. I might collapse and not rise again until 2010. Ugh.

And I still have presents to give some of you! If you want them before I lose consciousness, you'd better get your butts over here quick-like!

I have one for Gaydar, Kid-Scor, Tina, Brittany, Finn... [Checks presents] Isaac... Did I forget anyone? Oh, and Ethan, yours is taking longer than I thought it would. Would you be terribly offended if you didn't receive it until your birthday? ...Speaking of which, when is your birthday?

Oh, and one last thing, Q, I have some not-so-great news to tell you...

Would any of the witches and wizards here be interested in a DADA class?  There are too many Dark wizards here for my comfort, and it seems like learning and practicing defensive magic would not be a bad idea.

Excu-- Excuse me! Erm. I should like to know where I am. It's a bit rude to leave your guest alone in a new place like this, a-and without Nana, too. I-- oh alright, if I must-- I am terribly frightened so if you might deign to return and explain, I should be most grateful, o-or else-- or else I shan't let you play with Cheshire ever again!




H-hmph.

Coming! Stop knocking on the door! I'm coming! I just need a...

...

shirt?

I'm going to go out on a limb here and say the majority of you have some problems. Not in the 'hey I'm judging you, ha ha' kind of way but in the 'hey, I pay attention to stuff sometimes when there are shiny things involved' kind of way.

WELL YOUR PRAYERS HAVE BEEN ANSWERED, DENIZENS OF THIS.. PLACE. Because I've decided to set up shop here. That's right. I am an excellent problem solver. I totally helped out a friend who had a thing with this girl's sister and - well the point is it all worked out.

And by 'worked out' I mean no one got hurt.

..A lot.

So go on, let me have it, I have an eye, two ears, and shoulders that can withstand the tears of a weepy preteen (tested and proven!).